HI... READER

Actually, these days.... I put a tracker on my blog in such way I can know where are the readers coming from, and I hope I can deduce who are you....

but most of the it I couldn't,.... :(
kindly of you if you shout for my sake... so I can know you.

As Asian Quote:
" You never care somebody.. if you doesn't know them"

Learn from Butterfly

A Caterpillar has already became a beautiful butterfly
None in this world will disgust again with it
Everybody is greatful to see it and always wonders with the colors

We remember that a beautiful butterfly is used to be a disgusting caterpillar.
After some suffers, it becames one of the most beautiful creatures.

Egg --> Caterpillar --> Pupa --> Butterfly
so it is really look like our life

Loss --> Suffer --> Wake Up --> Happy

The nice observation of this novel is:

1. The time in butterfly phase is a lot smaller than the other phase, it is the same with happy;
2. After the metamorphosis, the other can get the advantage, namely cocoon (i.e., especially silk). It is the same when we can overcome our problem, hopefuly somebody can take a lesson learned of it.

I think today... I can say that I have done all my "contemplation" and I can conlude what I need to do, and start enjoy my life again.

• Never expect something as a return, then you'll never be regret
• Learn from the mistakes is the best way to learn, for me... learn for the others mistakes is even better. ;-)

Learn learn LEARN lEARN and it won't be enough.

Move default location of "special" FOLDER in XP

Fiuh...

As you know, the most effective medicine for the sickness that is suffered by Windows XP is "REINSTALL".
Several times, my sys-admin in my place suggests to reinstall my windows when I face un-solvable problem.
Mmmm somehow this approach is right.. and most of the time is effective to cure the sickness.

But before we do reinstall, the first rule is BACK-UP your data first.....
Mmmmmm but how about if XP crashes before we have a chance to back the data...???
There is a nice TIPS:
"Separate your data from the program by placing in the other partition, instead of C:\"

But I'm lazy because each time I download I need to change the directory first and save it there.
Then, my approach is:
It'd be nice if My Documents folder is placed in D:\, instead of C:\Documents and Settings\%username%....
and due to my habbit placing the recent download in Desktop (C:\Documents and Settings\%username%\Desktop), I want those folders are moved to other partion.

After googling: huplaaaa
We can modify the registry

HKEY_CURRENT_USER\SOFTWARE\Microsoft\Windows\ CurrentVersion\Explorer\Shell Folders

and all my wishes come true.
I can change default location of My Documents, My Pictures, Desktop ... mmmmm

so if I need to REINSTALL XP then I just do it... and surely my date will be safe in the other partition.
--
Ask google before asking dumb question ;-)

Smile

Lately, I put
SMILE and the worlds becomes better..
below of my signature in gmail mai. Actually, I'm not really sure about the validity that quote.

Today, I'm sure ...
Face everything with smile... because what happens to us has already been defined by HIM.
When HE decides about something than nothing can change it and never be changed.
So... face it
As believer, I believe it is the best for me, even most of the time, it is not the one that I want.

There is an amazon lays betweem the best one and the desired one.
Why there is no logical consequence about those concepts, life is easier if HE designs us always thought that we desiere the best one (desired -> best) or vice versa (best -> desired)

Smile in your face can give me a support even sometimes it is fake smile.
Once you can't smile event the fake one, then you don't have anything more.. to recover... and fall down until the bottom.

Another reason, why we shall smile if facing anything even the bad condition.
It because anything that happes to us that has been designed for use such that we can overcome. HE never gives something that beyond of our capabilities.
If it doesn't kill you than it'll make you stronger.

The last one, you shouldn't share any bad aura to others. By smiling, so you can cover up your sadness, and it won't make the others (of course, that care about you) worry

SMILE because we're always capable to do it, no matter happens

Wireless battery charger for mobile gadgests

Mmm
This summer , when I went to Denmark I needed another bag just to carry on all my charger.
As you know, I'm gadget mania...
More than 6 types of chargeer are laid in my backpack, and all of them has different power cords.
Why there is so many standards for power and all the gadgets implements their own power cord.
Moreover, you can see how is my charger in bag looks like, it looks like a bowl of noodle so many cables and they're scrambling arround.

Today, I've read status one of my friend (read: Rendo EL'99) about his wish of having wireless charger. I've heard this idea ages ago, thus I try to googling those keywords and ... walaaaaa

http://www.t3.co.uk/news/247/communications/mobile_phone/wireless_battery_charger_for_mobiles

Japan, NTT-DoCoMo, has already implemented the idea in Panasonic mobile phone.
It's cool isn't it...
You have a charger for everything and you just need to place all your gadgets on top a special pad.

Laptop, MP3, Camera, Mobile phone, PDA, and any batteries will be charged immidietly.

I wish many tech. provider will implement this concept, s.t. I don't need to fill my bag with several chargers when I do travelling.

Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word

What have I got to do to make you love me
What have I got to do to make you care
What do I do when lightning strikes me
And I wake to find that you're not there

What do I do to make you want me
What have I got to do to be heard
What do I say when it's all over
And sorry seems to be the hardest word

It's sad, so sad
It's a sad, sad situation
And it's getting more and more absurd
It's sad, so sad
Why can't we talk it over
Oh it seems to me
That sorry seems to be the hardest word

What do I do to make you love me
What have I got to do to be heard
What do I do when lightning strikes me
What have I got to do
What have I got to do
When sorry seems to be the hardest word

Remember

More than 2 weeks, I don't remember her (in the sense miss her badly)

I think my way is working.. :P
delete all her number (incluidng home and cellphone) and hide the mail address. So it'd be difficult if I try to contact her.
Not contacting is the initial step to move on.

But today, I start remembering her anymore.. :-s
and since I'm in Trento it's easy for to find her contact adress that I hide.
But as soon as I find it, I realize that I shouldn't contact her, if I want her feels better.

KANGEN I hope you're OK

best

Vacation

It is the nicest word that I have for the last several months.

Thanks for all Italian Companions that have arranged everything for tomorrow trip. I haven't done anything for this trip.... and maybe It is the first thing in my life.. I'm being a parasit... just taking from community and not giving anything.

Thanks for
Mary for arranging the flight, lodging, and review the plan
Roberto for arranging the plan and touristic object
Marco for booking the lodging
Marta for buying train ticket

and I aint do anything.. :( Cattivo

I hope after this event I can back to real Yudis
and not pretending smile even something miserable happens.

Like Cocoon that goes for meditaion for while before it achieves next steps of better life.
Maybe vacation on Denmark can bring the same philosophy.
We can learn from everything in the world, depending on the way we think about it.

Bismilla hirrahman nir rahim

--
Happiness is the aim of the human being life.
what is the happiness?? [hahaha that's the real question]

Priority

Today, we have a plan to arrange a dinner before everybody leaving for Summer Vacation.

Someone "special" is the one that has that initiative, that's very nice isn't it?

But unluckly, I have many things to be finished in two days.
I know my limit and my priority.

If I'm Yudis at several days ago.. so I'll skip my work and attending the dinner, and work like a hell afteward.

But, as I declare my self, that I need to change to move on and keep your priority and plan...
so I need to keep working til all things finish, and skip the dinner... :( [argghhhh]

Somehow, I don't agree with my decision but what can I do... the commandment has already declared and the word has already given. Man will be honored because what he says.

I wish she is upset (it means my existence is something) but she is understand with my situation.

Sorry..sorry sorry... sorry... :( WONDERFUL

Occhio non vede, cuore non fa male

That's another quote that I learn from the wonderful.

Many things we can do beyond our capability since we have a belief and a will.

If there is a will then there is a way
I can do many things as long as I still have a will or motivation to do so.

Motivation:
it is a feeling/a mental state that motivate you to do something. This thing comes from your sense (e.g., eyes, skins, ears, nose, etc).
It is a mental state/feeling. So, it is not necessary that is coming from the thought.

What are the sources of the motivation:
- any type of feelings: from hate until love
- any type of belief
- anythings

You do something because of you can or you want.
Ax1: doing --> can or want
You want to do something because you have motivation
Ax2: want --> motivation

Einstein said, "The nicest thing in the life is living for someone and not from someone"

Mmmm
because someone feels honorable to have X, then I'd do X
so I can say it is a motivation to do X

what happens if now, it embarrasses someone?
so I don't have a motivation anymore
P1: !motivation

I don't have any capability to end this.
P2: !capability <-> !can

Ax2: want -> motivation
!motivation -> !want (there is no motivation, means I shouldn't want anymore)

Ax1: doing -> can or want
!can and !want --> !doing

I think based on my logic I need to stop to do it.
And move on....
Today is 1 step, if tomorrow I keep doing it so at least becoming 2 steps.

Jika aku tak melihat maka mungkin lebih mudah aku tuk mulai melupakan dia.

Thanks for the last words WONDERFUL

DAMN....

Damn...

Today, I feel bad.. :( even I stay in nice place for Summer School

Miss somebody... and even worse, we have a small roar before.. :( so it makes me even more uncomfortable.

No Phone Credit, so I can't do anything
No Internet Connection, once I have She is not online
No Internet Phone, because I lost my headset

Want to buy Phone Credit through internet, I can't because my credit card limit is reached after paying hotel for summer school.. :(

why they happen in the same time....
So "PERFECT" life.. :(

Thanks to the Earth

Hi the Earth,

I wish you can read this statement
[leave me a sign if you can read it, can the Earth write in Blog? hihihihi]

Thanks for everything....
For teach me:
How to behave
How to react
How to keep the principle things above of everything

And for nice time and opportunity also.
It's a long time, I live in your hold without any thanks, even implicitly.

As a human, I always live to exploit the Earth,
and now it's the time for the earth demanding.
Therefore, I'll be away for while to adjust everything in order to suit what your demand

you're really strong and I'm damn sure you're not weak at all.
Surely, I'm too Haughty to say all, directly
Sorry for that

--
Ego is necessary, but there is an amazon, even bigger, between having Ego and being Egoistic

SHOUTING

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm K****N pengen ketemu...
one day more...[always one day more in any point of the time]

You can do it.... :D

The capability of a man is unlimited if he wants.
It is the case also for the stupidity.

JAMES BLUNT - You're Beautiful

My life is brilliant.
My life is brilliant.My love is pure.
I saw an angel.
Of that I'm sure.
She smiled at me on the subway.
She was with another man.
But I won't lose no sleep on that,'Cause I've got a plan.
You're beautiful. You're beautiful.You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,And I don't know what to do,'Cause I'll never be with you.
Yeah, she caught my eye,As we walked on by.
She could see from my face that I was,Flying high,
And I don't think that I'll see her again,
But we shared a moment that will last till the end.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,And I don't know what to do,'Cause I'll never be with you.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.You're beautiful, it's true.
There must be an angel with a smile on her face,When she thought up that I should be with you.
But it's time to face the truth,
I will never be with you.

Why....

Once I have a feeling .....I failed to proceed it.
I have lost it in the last 2-3 years...
and now I have it... happy and feel relieve.

Actually, I've know she doesn't has the same feeling towards me, but I still go forward.
.....
finally, Last night she speaks up and wants someting for me...
She wants me to end it....

SO... I WILL DO IT
because she wants and because of me
fiuh... back to the phase 8 months ago, close the feeling and life as YUDIS in the last 2 years

hihihihi That's a life

One and Half....

One and Half has already passed, but it still reminds in my mind... as fresh as a second ago.

Mmmm tonight, I try to being silent and let everything goes as well as it's never happended.
It's tough...and not impossible

Subject has already moved up successfully, and it is not the case for me... One and half months has already passed.. and the feeling are still there and moreover, it is one and half than before.

I shouldn't too hard to my self.... take it slowly and enjoy what is there.... and let the time becoming the advisory...

It's hard but not impossible... :D
bissmillah...

best,

Sehat ndak ya??

Semalem aku jalan lagi ama dia....
antara kangen, seneng, dan kehilangan...
anehlah rasanya .......

dia dah jelas nolak.... tapi kita jalan roaming arround berdua-an..
dan ... :(

di satu sisi.. seneng karena deket ama dia...
ada yang diperhatiin dan disayang...

di sisi lain... ngerasa ... koq.. bebel banget sih..
udah jelas ditolak.. koq tetep keukeh ama dia...and bukan coba move up.......

Sehat ndak sih.????? :(

Remember

These days, I try to being cool and not remember that thing.In this weekend. I had a nice moment with all my friends.Mountaineering and I could do a short mountain running.But suddenly, I remembered.... mmm but by the end of the day I promise to myself, "Remembering is OK, but not getting drown in it"but...yesterday, She called and told that we need to speak...mmmm it sounds good.. :Dbut it gives me more feeling to remember... :(mmmm that's tradeoffLet's see what happens this afternoon---It seems like "The Story of Joe" when he asks to the God to leave him alone. But he still keeps asking to the God....does he really want to be alone....

Good bye... and sorry for my behave

LOVE?
mmm live can be coloful because of it, but the color can be "blue" the one that I like most or others that I hate .. ;)

Sometimes feeling should face with the reality and they need to compromise, in this circumstance mind can be used as a mediator to find the compromisation.......

Today, I should start new "chapter"... mmmm or maybe I MUST.. MUST ... MUST

I need to rid my feeling towards her.. in order to move on.. because this start making her un-comfortable (besides me...of)
course)

Sorry Mary... I need to kill the feeling.. even I believe it's a crime, but I can't afford to make her un-comfortable.

I'll do everything to make her always be "CHEERFUL" with any means and even I should help her to "reach" her dream as she told. I WILL DO... (just recall my word, and I'll help)

SORRY for my CHILDSH and my BEHAVE

P.S: I wish she read

May the TIME be a good advisory

AMIEN